The Guardian Angel and the TukTuk

Someone asked me once, "What is the worst thing about living overseas?" The answer, at least for me, was very simple:  it is the fear and feeling of being stranded. 

I can tell you with absolute confidence that this is the worst feeling for me, though I did not enter this lifestyle knowing that. I did not find out until my husband and I went to Paris for our anniversary. I happily, if naively, agreed to flying into Charles de Gaulle Airport and then taking the metro system into the city and then catching a cab to our hotel.  I thought there would be no issue for me. And I was partially right.

Navigating the airport was no problem. Catching the right metro to the city was no issue. The cab, well... We had booked a hotel room in the Montmartre neighborhood in Paris, and despite my husband's ability to speak French, the cab driver had not the vaguest idea where our hotel was, even armed with the address. So like any professional hack, the cab driver literally dumped us off on a side street stating that the hotel was around here somewhere, unloaded all our luggage, insisted on payment and sped off. Standing on a side street in Paris is one thing,doing so with a veritable mountain of luggage is another. However, doing all those things with no cell service to your phone, and then your husband announcing "I'll be back in a few minutes" in an overly chipper voice and leaving you standing there is something else again. For the record, I do not speak French and had not idea what I would say if someone said something about this jet-lagged, middle-aged women standing with a heap of luggage by herself in the middle of Montmartre. 

Armed with that knowledge, I have done everything I could humanly think possible to prevent myself from being put into that situation again. Or at least I thought I had...

The first weekend we were in India we were invited to a Sunday brunch. It was great and we had a wonderful time. Since we have not had the chance to go out and explore much, we decided to head out for some shopping. After all, now armed with our handy-dandy cab phone app, we had managed to traverse the city to get to brunch, and therefore shopping should be no issue. And it wasn't - the cab arrived, picked us up, knew right where we were headed - all accomplished with the greatest of ease. 

I had a great time showing Barrett the mall; I had already been there. We found some fun things to buy for the house and after wandering around a bit decided it was time to head home. There was just one problem...The cab phone app utterly refused to work. We did everything we could think of to try to make the app work and finally figured out that the mall was in a dead zone - oh the irony as the mall is apparently aptly called InOrbit Mall. 

So we decided that perhaps if we walked up the hill a bit we would get better reception and maybe, just maybe the app would start working again. Now when I say walk up the hill, I suspect that many of you are imagining a tranquil suburban mall, with pedestrians strolling, birds chirping and sidewalks bordered by trees. 

That would be almost the exact inverse of the reality of walking up the hill by the mall. A veritable sea of Tuktuks and cabs congregated like hungry sharks at the entrance of the mall - each waiting for their chance to lure a departing mall customer into their vehicles. There are no sidewalks anywhere in the entire city, so amongst these vehicles, pedestrians are attempting to safely circumnavigate the traffic while losing neither their packages nor children. Into this fray we began to make our way up the hill. We had only made it a few feet before Barrett noticed that an empty cab from the company we use was amongst the sea of vehicles. We got into the cab and began what turned out to be a fruitless attempt to arrange for transport to our apartment all the way across the city. The driver did speak English, did not know our neighborhood - despite 2 telephone calls to our housekeeper for directions in Telegu and then quoted an exorbitant price for the ride - especially since we were confident he did not know where he was going. So we got out of the cab.  

We continued our slog up the hill hauling our packages when another driver approached us. In beautiful English he said, where do you want to go? Now given my husband's line of work and the fact that we are both seasoned travelers, we were a little wary. We asked if was a driver and he responded "yes!" So we explained that our situation. We told him where we lived and he responded that he knew that area and the road we lived on. 

Great!  How much? He quoted a figure that while still high, it was half of what the cab had demanded. Eyeing him suspiciously, my husband responded that his amount was far above what our cab company charged, the driver patiently responded "yes, but they aren't coming to get you are they? Net is down Sir." He had a point. 

It was then that we discovered that this was not a cab driver but instead a driver of one of the myriad of Tuktuks swarming around us. In for a penny, in for a pound as they say, we got in the Tuktuk and held on. Our driver beaming driver proudly shot off into traffic and very competently navigated us across the city and into our neighborhood. I will likely never know what the security detail at the front gate of our building thought as these two heavy set, middle aged Americans pulled up in a Tuktuk, but their faces registered combinations of bewilderment, amusement and maybe a little respect. Our driver was clearly thrilled that in one fare he had made as much as a dozen or more trips would have netted him. 

It is like that old joke about the man whose house is caught in the flood. His neighbors come by and say "the flood is getting worse, grab your things and come with us." He refuses saying "God will take care of me." The flood waters rise and the man is forced to take refuge in the second story of his house. As he is looking out the window he sees a guy with a boat going down his street. The guy in the boat shouts up, "the rain is not stopping and the water is getting higher! Get your things and I will take you to safety." The man refuses and shouts back "God will take care of me." More and more rains come and the water continues to rise and the man is forced to escape to the roof of his house. This time a helicopter comes by and sees the man on the roof. Using a bullhorn, the pilot says to the man, "the flood is out of control, grab the ladder I am throwing down to you and I will take you to safety." The man waves the helicopter off yelling back "God will take care of me!" The flood waters sweep the house down river and the man dies. At the Pearly Gates, the man goes up the St. Peter and says "I don't understand, I was in the flood and I was sure that God would take care of me. How is it possible that I died?" St. Peter looks at the man and says, "Did you miss your neighbors? The man in the boat? and the helicopter?" 

The lesson is to let go of your expectations and amazing things happen. So when your Guardian Angel shows up in a Tuktuk… Get in!